


The Reverse Cowgirl

by thedarkestdaisy



Category: Revolution (TV)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, short-fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-03
Updated: 2015-04-03
Packaged: 2018-03-21 01:26:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3672324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedarkestdaisy/pseuds/thedarkestdaisy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Good morning Bass. It's 2:42 and you're still awake which leads me to believe you've been up to no good.” He laughs into the phone.<br/>“Miles, I need your help.” </p>
<p>Bass ends up in the emergency room with a broken bone...r.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Reverse Cowgirl

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta'd. This idea popped out while I was having a conversation with my friend about her boyfriend. Because she broke him in December and nobody outside the two knew about it. Until now.

Miles wakes up in the middle of the night to a call from Bass. Expecting it to be another drunken “I Love You So Much” phone call he presses the record button and answers his phone.

“Good morning Bass. It's 2:42 and you're still awake which leads me to believe you've been up to no good.” He laughs into the phone.

“Miles, I need your help.” 

Bass' voice is strained and Miles immediately sits up in bed. The sound of Bass in distress instantly triggers him into awareness. His friend does a lot of stupid shit but sometimes the guy manages to get in big trouble.

“What's going on? Are you okay?” 

“No. I'm going to the ER right now. I really fucked up this time.” Bass sighs on the other end.

“Okay. I'll be there. Let me get some clothes on and let Nora know I'm leaving.” Miles pulls back the covers and dashes to the bathroom.

“Dear God, Miles. Don't tell her anything. Just meet me at the hospital.” Bass practically begs on the other side. 

“What do you mean don't tell her?” He looks down at his wife sleeping peacefully on their bed. “I have to tell her where I'm going, stupid. I can't just run off into the night after your dumb-ass like old times.”

“Oh. Holy Shit. It's turning colors, Miles.”

“What?” Miles stops short while pulling on a pair of jeans.

“Just get here. I'm going to need my DOA for a surgery.”

Miles sighs and rolls his eyes.

“I told you to stop using WebMD.”

“Just get here. And when you do you have to promise not to flip out.”

Before he can answer Bass cuts him off and the line goes dead. On the way to the ER Miles thinks of all the crazy shit his friend has done and comes up with new ideas on how Bass can pay him back for waking him up at three in the morning. When he reaches the ER he quickly finds a spot to park and runs inside. Having been here for Bass a thousand times he knows the woman at the front desk by name and she greets him with a smile as she presses a button to open the doors to the waiting room.

He walks in and immediately makes a beeline to the nurse's desk. 

“Hello Mr. Matheson. I knew it would only be a matter of time until you showed up when I got report that your friend came in earlier.”

“Is it bad and are there any cops involved?” He cringes. Miles had to deal with the police once after Bass beat the shit out of a guy who wouldn't stop touching some girl at a bar. It took a while to convince the men in blue that the guy wasn't taking no for an answer and that his friends may have very well saved that woman's life.

“You don't know yet?” The woman snorts and her brown eyes sparkle with mirth. “I think I'm going to let you talk to him. We got him in pretty quick so he might be on a drip for pain and not completely lucid but I'm sure he'll be happy to see you.”

After she tells him the room number and points him down a hallway he takes off. Hopefully Bass isn't too out of his mind by the pain meds to tell him what went down tonight. When he comes upon the door he knocks once and then walks in. 

Bass is reclined on a bed and smiles at him when he notes his presence.

“They're taking me to surgery in a few minutes.” He has a dopey grin on his face and then drops his head back down to the pillow to stare at the ceiling some more. Miles relaxes, Bass seems like he's okay enough to tell him what happened.

He doesn't spot anything wrong with Bass right off the bat. Hopefully it isn't something that's life threatening.

“Miles, do you see the spiders on the ceiling?”

Miles looks up and frowns at the ceiling. Scratch that. Bass isn't in his right mind at all.

“Nope. Just some florescent lights up there, buddy.” Miles moves to sit on a chair beside the bed. Whatever they have in his IV pump is already working its magic.

“No.” Bass shakes his head and points up above him. “They're mating and ripping eachother's heads off and setting themselves on fire. This whole place is going to burn down.”

Miles' eyes widen at his words just as a doctor comes in.

The man looks around and mutters something about a woman slipping out for a moment before introducing himself. 

“Hello,” He shakes Miles' hand. “I'm Dr. Blanchard and I'll be doing the surgery here in a few minutes. I just wanted to make sure you're both aware of what we'll be doing and to get a few papers signed. Then we'll take him to the OR.”

“Okay. So what's going on?”

“Your friend has fractured his penis and we'll-”

Miles can't even fucking help it. 

The second the words fractured penis escape the doctor's bearded mouth Miles doubles over in laughter. And then Bass starts laughing at the sight of Miles completely losing it while trying to have a serious conversation.

“Are you telling me he broke his penis?! Oh, God. I can't breathe.” Miles wheezes and tries to calm himself down. 

“Sir, we need you to quickly sign a few papers before he goes under. Time is very important otherwise there could be permanent damage.”

“To his penis.” Miles has to bite his lip in order to stop laughing. He looks over to Bass to find the man still laughing and rolls his eyes.

A few minutes later papers have been signed and two nurses are rolling him out of the ER to another part of the hospital. He is directed to a new waiting room and falls asleep while waiting for his friend's procedure to finish up.

Two hours later the doctor wakes him and tells him everything went fine and that his friend and his girlfriend are in a new room. 

“Girlfriend?”

“Yes, the woman that drove him here was introduced to us as his girlfriend.”

Miles doesn't realize he's stopped walking until he notices the doctor has stopped and turned to look at him, waiting for him to catch up.

“And she's still here?” Miles is confused. Not once did Bass ever mention having a girlfriend. 

He would know about that sort of thing wouldn't he? Bass tells him everything. With over the top details and sometimes crude hand gestures.

When they reach the door they walk in together.

Charlie looks up from the chair beside Bass, laughing at something his friend is saying. He frowns. They've been spending more time together so it's not odd that she's here to share in his humiliation. However there is something odd at the sight the two of them make. It could be that Bass is coming out of the anesthesia used on him that's giving him that dopey grin, but then Miles takes stock of a few more things going on. Charlie has the chair against the bed and is leaning her upper body over the edge. Bass has captured one of her hands with his own and as he laughs he strokes the back of her hand slowly. 

Charlie's eyes widen at the sight of her uncle.

This was not how she envisioned telling Miles that she and Bass having been seeing each other for the past month.

“Are you the one referred to as girlfriend?” He asks with a cringe, hoping and praying that he's wrong.

Charlie winces and then turns to look down at Bass. They both shrug their shoulders and it's enough of an answer to make Miles' head begin to ache. He drags his hands down his face in irritation, causing Bass to giggle at him. He doesn't want to think about what the two of them were doing to cause a penile fracture. “I told you not to be mad at me.” Bass laughs from behind his hand.

He turns to the doctor and asks him if he needs to do anything else and when his friend can be discharged.  


“Well, I would like to keep him overnight for observation. He will be sent home with a care packet of information and my phone number if any problems occur. No intercourse for a month until it's healed. We'll schedule a follow appointment with him before his release tomorrow. I suggest no more “reverse cow girl” during sex.” Dr. Blanchard looks pointedly to Charlie who has the good grace to look away before before Miles catches her smirk.

When the doctor leaves Miles closes the door and debates whether or not he should wait until Bass' mind is less foggy to start yelling at him or if he'll feel better to just start doing it now.

“I'm going back to bed.” He looks down at Charlie with a glare. “You will tell your mother who you are dating as soon as he can walk without crying.”

Charlie and Bass nod silently.

“Take care Bass I'll be back tomorrow morning. See ya later, Cowgirl.”

When he shuts the door to the room behind him he can hear the couple break out in laughter. As Miles walks back to his car he tries to tell himself that everything will be okay. And it will be; until Rachel finds out.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry it was so short. My focus is on my Topsy Tury fic atm.  
> Have a wonderful Friday you cloud surfing baby angels!  
> xoxo


End file.
